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  1. Back To Top    #21
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    Oscar manages to get back on the sleigh and Abuela ask if he retrieved the documents. He tell her yes and that he also planted the empty tube of BenGay just as she asked him to. She congratulated him on accomplishing the mission and they few off into the night. Hershel decides to make a stop to replenish his beer supply. Never know when it might come in handy again.

    Carol goes. Back to the scene of the crime and can't believe that she missed this tube of BenGay right in front of her face. She had assumed that Oscar had to be the muscle of the operation and that someone else had to be pulling the strings. Now she knows who. Axel had always talked about Queen McLeods love for BenGay. The only problem is that she has no idea how to get to Woodbury. She then realizes that Daryl is on a mission there and knows that she can just follow his stench. Sne sets off to Woodbury. She doesn't bother telling the others. This is her fight and hers alone. Axel will be avenged.

    Getting to Woodbury was relatively easy. Can't miss Daryl's stench, but his trio went cold at one point. Maybe Michonne hosed him down. What got her the rest of the way was the sound of festivities. She peek in and see there's a catering truck so she assumes it a party. Luckily she happened to bring some fireworks. She shoots them off and the crowd is immediately distracted so she sneaks in.

    It it doesn't take her long to realize where the Queen stays. The Woodbury penthouse is like a palace. Sne makes her way to the main bedroom and ends up in a room full of Walker heads in a fish tank. WTF? She then hears a noise and checks it out. in a hidden room there is a little Walker girl in a chain. Carol looks at her. "So this is where you ran off too, Sophia?" She's torn on what to do. She knows that's not her daughter anymore but she can't just leave her. She picks the lock and just them a man with an eyepatch wonders in. This has to be the Gov that Axel always talked about. In the confusion Sophia takes off running again. Gov says "Dammit, now do you see why I kept her chained up? She won't get far". Carol explains to him that she was his daughter. Gov agrees to have his men catch her and to release her to Carol. Carol can't figure out why this man is being so nice to her and then she realizes she's wearing her leather. Oh, it's on. What a better way to take her revenge out on McLeod for having Axel killed. Yep, they get it on to make a long story short.

    McLeod walks up the stairs to grab another tube of BenGay and hears the ruckus. She enter the room to find Gov and Carol on her bed. She immediately screams and goes straight into Hulk mode. One might think that this would spell the end for Carol, but just then Carol goes into an equally intimidating Rambo mode. McLeod knows now that isn't gonna be like Andrea or Lily. These would destroy the entire palace if they did this right here." There is only one way to settle this" McLeod said. Find out how in the next chapter.

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    Once again, it's Glenn and Maggie's turn in the tower to be on watch. Well, we all know how much watching will actually be done and that is pretty much none. After the colossal failure of letting Bob handle the tower it's apparent that it's always gonna be these two up there. Not that they mind. Well, to make a long story short, they are all hot and bothered and ready to go. Clothes removed and all and Glenn goes to reach for his stash of condoms. They aren't there. Oh shit! Maggie give him that Aww Hell No look so they get to their feet and decide to grab the binoculars and do the watch thing for a sec.

    Glenn is puzzled when he sees Tyreese out in the field making what appears to be water balloons and beside him is a lawn chair with a doll sitting on it. And Tyreese appears to be talking to the doll. Glenn is pissed so he heads that way. Maggie has to remind him that he has no pants on so he runs back and gets dressed.

    Both the of them make it over to Tyreese and he ask them if they would like to join Mika's birthday party. They informed him in not such a polite manner that they had their own party planned until he stole their party favors. He nonchalantly told them that Mika had sent him up there because she knew he could get some "balloons" there. He said that he knew they would be odd shaped balloons but who was he to deny the girl her birthday wish.

    Glenn and Maggie look at each other perplexed and have to ask who the fuck is Mika? They reminded him that Mika was killed by her crazy sister. Tyreese points at the doll in the chair and lets them know that Mika's spirit lives within that doll and she talks to him. Fortunately, for Ty and Mika they have other things to worry about and decide to let it go and head out on a supply run to fulfill their needs. They warn Ty to stay out their shit no matter what the damn doll tells him and that next time they will fuck the doll up.

  3. Back To Top    #23
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    McGovernah VI: The Battle Royal.


    The residents of Woodbury are in a state of excitement. The annual walker fight Battle Royal competition is only days away. McGovernah have been making preparations behind the scenes for weeks to ensure that only the best walker and human fighters will be available to take part. The Woodbury-ites can barely contain themselves for the scheduled main event. McLeod herself is going to take on all the surviving participants including the undisputed champion, a walker known only as 'The Favourite'. Limo's have been arriving for days and now the competitors are living like kings in McGovernah's five star accommodation.

    As ever things have not gone without some problems. The small matter of Abuela and Oscar's failure to retrieve McGovernah's backpack has not gone down well and their subsequent failed execution and then escape has sent McLeod into a black mood. Her decision not to take care of them herself has sent a clear signal to the residents of Woodbury that all is not well with their Queen. The Gov's screams from the torture chamber have been heard all over town for days, but have been noticeably lacking in their usual volume.

    Despite this, a celebration barbecue for the return of Psycho Lizzie is in full swing. The good people of Woodbury are gorging themselves on the delicious and seemingly endless free meat samples provided by Gareth and his team of caterers, who serve everyone with the same satisfied smirk.
    Elsewhere in the town however, an annoying problem has just arisen.

    McLeod and Carol Peletier stand face to face snarling at each other. The Gov frantically starts to pull on his clothes but realizing that there is no point in pretending, stops and instead watches the two women. McLeod, never taking her eyes off Carol bellows at him "Radio Shumptinez and get them up here. I want her locked in the dungeon.There is only one way to settle this, but not here and now!".
    Carol looks at McLeod in disgust. "Let's do this now" she hisses "You took something of mine and I took something of yours, are we really going to fight....over him?". She looks at the Gov who says "Now hang on a minute.....".
    McLeod smiles coldly at Carol "This isn't about him, this is about you and your disrespect of my property. Anyway my people only took back what was ours".
    "Axel wasn't yours" says a confused Carol. "Who the hell is Axel, that guy on Abuela's team?" asks McLeod just as Shumptinez burst in. "But if you didn't kill him..." Carol starts to protest, but Martinez tasers her and they drag her off to the dungeon. "Spread the word" McLeod tells them "The Battle Royal has been moved forward....to tonight!".
    "My dear....if I can just explain....." starts the Gov in his most charming voice. "SHUT UP!" snaps McLeod and pops him square in the jaw. She steps over his body and grabs her Bengay cream. She needs to be at full strength, she has plans for Carol Peletier.

    As darkness falls the whole town has turned out and the atmosphere is electric. The Gov sporting a bruised and swollen jaw is Master of Ceremonies and works the already excited crowd.
    "Ladies and gentlemen, esteemed guests and family. Tonight we come together to enjoy the very best entertainment the ZA has to offer. Walkers and humans fighting hand to hand for a place in the final. And then the jewel in the crown, my own darling wife takes on the winners in a fight to the death...let tonight's festivities begin!"
    The Gov takes his place in the royal box next to McLeod who ignores him, he looks over at Milton and TD who are sitting with Lizzie and walker Nick and who smile nervously, he gives them a thumbs up....it will be fine!



    Attendants stand by with buckets of human blood and entrails to cover the walkers in and incite them to fight. The first fight is between walker Randall and Moronic police officer Leon Bassett. Walker Randall seems nervous as Bassett begins to repeatedly pummel him but above all expectation and probably because Bassett is an idiot, Randall wins his fight , ripping Bassett's stomach open and killing him.
    The evening's entertainment continues apace. The walker Diva match is won by Amy who rips Creepy Clara's head from her body complete with spine and tosses it into the crowd. Behind them Leon Bassett's corpse re-animates and lumbers off into the night.


    A fatal four-way match between Allen and a member of the Vatos gang against two particularly vicious walkers takes an interesting turn when Allen in his cowardice shoves the Vatos member at the walkers who repeatedly bite him. He turns immediately and all three grab Allen, ripping him apart and showering the first three rows with blood.


    Shumptinez win their round and go through to the final and 'The Favourite' destroys everyone in his path and goes through too. soon it is time for the main event. The crowd are drunk and restless and are impatient for the inevitable bloodbath.



    The Gov takes the mic. "ladies and gentlemen our main event this evening. All our survivors will face my wife in a last woman standing match ....cuz face it boys, you're all gonna lose!" Amy looks happy until he says "Sorry sweetheart you won't be winning either against the myth....the legend....the Queen of Woodbury....McLeod!".

    With this McLeod steps down from the royal box and into the arena , as she does so, Carol is dragged through the crowd and thrown into the centre....it's on!

    The competitors spring into immediate action. Amy runs headlong at McLeod who performs a McLeodline flipping her completely over and into the path of 'The Favourite' who rips her arms off as if pulling the wings from a fly. This galvanizes Carol into action, she backflips out of his path and grabs hold of the Vatos walker,she gives him a Kavid-driver launching him face down in the dirt and then twists his head clean off. The crowd goes crazy.

    Shumptinez are toying with walker Randall. They push him backwards and forwards between them. In the royal box Nick becomes agitated at seeing his friend injured. "Lizzie dear, take him outside he's spoiling my fun" says the Gov. Nick lunges forward and the Gov punches him. Lizzie puts her arms around Nick and leads him away. TD gets up to follow but the Gov says she can handle it. Lizzie takes Nick away with a backwards glance at the Gov, her expression is unreadable. Sitting with his 'caterers' Gareth watches this unfold with interest. He looks at Martin and gestures let's go.

    Back in the arena Shumptinez finish Randall. Shumpert holds him still while Martinez pulls out his entrails. randall looks in horror but it is too late, shumpert crushes his skull and they kick him to one side.

    McLeod and Carol come face to face. McLeod charges at Carol...Hulk-mode has been activated. She grabs Carol's hair and begins pounding her in the face. Carol thrashes and kicks with all her might. McLeod administers a huge blow into Carol's gut and sends her flying into 'The Favourite' who grabs and tries to bite her. Carol reaches into her catsuit and pulls out her petrol canteen, doses him and ignites it. 'The Favourite' runs burning from the arena with Shumptinez in hot pursuit!

    Carol spins around just in time to see McLeod heading straight for her, Carol goes full-Rambo and flings more fuel at McLeod who ducks and continues her charge. They disintegrate into a snarl of thrashing limbs and gnashing teeth. Blow after blow. The crowd are on the edge of their seats.

    Shumptinez run back in brandishing a burnt walker head, this distracts Carol and McLeod slugs her full in the face and puts her in the arthritic leg-lock. Carol tries to fight but begins to lose consciousness as Shumptinez walk over to see her die.

    A sudden noise distracts the crowd who look up to see Santa's sleigh yet again overhead. Oscar leans out and throws something down which lands next to McLeod. The sleigh disappears. McLeod looks at the item which appears to be some sort of document, she looks at the cover and freezes. She lets go of Carol and grabs the papers, she glances frantically at the Gov and then sprints out of the arena. The crowd begin to murmur their discontent as the Gov gets to his feet. "Show's over!" he snarls and goes to follow his wife.
    Shumptinez drag Carol to her feet and start to take her away when TD stops them "The Gov wants you to go to the penthouse, I said I would deal with her" he says. Shumptinez follow the Gov as TD grabs hold of Carol and says quietly "I can help you get out of here, I think we can help each other".

    In McGovernah's penthouse the Gov is pleading with McLeod to tell him what is wrong. But she tells him she can't and that she wouldn't know where to begin even if she could.
    The Gov walks over and takes a box from the nightstand. He hands it to McLeod. "I've been keeping these for the right time and I think that time is now" he says.
    She opens the box, it is filled with severed fingers each one wearing an engagement ring more expensive than the last. She smiles.
    "We need to send a message" says the Gov "We need to show that we are a united front and stronger than ever....We need to have a renewal of our vows and we need to have another wedding. Bigger, better and more elaborate than the first and we need people to know that we...are...McGovernah!



    In the next instalment of McGovernah....everybody loves a wedding! So get ready,you know it's going to be a bumpy ride!

    Brought to you as ever by NimbusForTheMasses
    we may be weird....but you're reading this.


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    Leon Bassett might have been so dumb in life that, even as a cop, he didn't even remember to check his safety, but as a walker he's shocked to realize that he has retained one memory. A hate for the man that, in his mind, was the one that held him down on the police force. Took his spot as the rightful sheriff. Rick fucking Grimes. As he continues lumbering along he comes across a teenage girl and a walker, but for some reason has no desire to bite her. Weird. She approaches him with great confidence and introduces herself as Lizzie. Leon and Nich exchange their Daryl like mumbling pleasantries and of course Lizzie can understand them. She's the Walker whisperer after all. She hears about his mission to go after the big bad bully Rick amd points him in the direction of the prison amd they part ways.

    Leon tells himself that he is gonna take a bite outta Rick Grimes and slowly head toward the prison.

  5. Back To Top    #25
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    Michonne, Daryl and Guillermo came out from their hiding place and tried to make sense of everything they had seen. First the failed execution and almost wholly unbelievable rescue and then the events of the Battle Royal.
    Neither Michonne or Daryl had been concerned when they saw Carol dragged into the arena, they knew from experience that she was more than capable of taking care of herself and had been laughing at the idea of McLeod taking on a badass like Carol. At least that was until they saw her put in the leg-lock. They hadn't expected the old lady to nearly take her out. They had been preparing to help her when the sleigh had swooped in and brought everything to an end.
    Along with Guillermo they ran quietly along the fence to see where she had been taken...and nearly ran straight into her and TD coming in the opposite direction!
    Daryl was overjoyed to meet TD and began to tell him all about Anthony in great detail. Carol rolled her eyes at Michonne who made a throat-slitting action behind Daryl's back. Carol sighed and shook her head.
    Guillermo disenchanted at the thought of more stories about that freakin' turtle, made his excuses and told them they should go on without him and headed towards the Woodbury gates.


    Michonne and Daryl's group make their way back to the prison. Daryl walks ahead with TD telling him all about Anthony's feeding and toilet habits. Behind them Michonne and Carol snicker between themselves and TD catches the word "Sucker" along with hysterical giggling.

    Back at Woodbury Guillermo has been admitted to the town and brought before McGovernah. He says that he is looking for Felipe and when he mentions Abuela it gets McLeod's attention. She walks slowly round him making an appraisal. She asks his name and when he tells her, her eyes light up. She confers with the Gov and then informs Guillermo that he can stay but that his name will now be 'Gargulio 2'. When he begins to protest she shouts "GARGULIO 2!" at him and then walks away after instructing Shumptinez to show him to his new accommodation. As McGovernah leaves Guillermo hears the Gov say "Well he's certainly an improvement on the last one!...".

    TD is ready to scream. Daryl has spent almost two hours telling him every single damn detail about his stupid god-forsaken turtle and he has had enough. It doesn't help that Carol and Michonne have completely ignored his signals for help and have been openly mocking him behind his back and discussing at length the Governor's 'performance'. Daryl of course chats happily about Anthony and is oblivious.
    They approach the prison and see two figures who frantically try to hide. Carol and Daryl recognize them immediately. It's Shane...and Lori!

    Realising that they are caught, Shane and Lori join hands and make no attempt to hide. Carol asks them what the hell they are doing, everyone thought they were dead! Shane steps forward and with great sincerity tells them that they have come to speak to Rick and that then they will be leaving...with their daughter!

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    Glenn and Maggie are once again the tower, but have decided that today is a day for activities that involve thier clothes being on. They are a smart couple and realize that these bonding moments are essential to a healthy relationship. That's at least what renowned sex therapist Eugene once told them. They are going through the old Greene family photo albums. Maggie is still a bit crushed that Hershel was brainwashed into not remembering her but she is coping. Glen see a picture of a blonde and ask who the hell that is. Maggie squints really hard and can't seem to remember either. Probably Otis and Patricia's daughter. They then see a pic of Jimmy and wonder what became of him. In the distance they hear Daryl screaming for Anthony at the top of his lungs and immediately stand up and are shocked by who they see walking with Daryl, Michonne, and Carol. They immediately head inside to inform Rick.

    TD seems pretty impressed with the setup TF has here. He can't wait to meet their leader and for Daryl to finally get the fuck away from him to go see that fucking turtle. He now know more about proper turtle feces cleanup than he ever wished to.

    As as they get closer to the prison within sight Carol and Michonne sort of distance themselves from each other. They agreed that their late night visits are best left kept to themselves. If Rick knew about them he might never pop the question. As if Michonne hasn't already been waiting long enough. A girls got needs.

    The esteemed Rick Grimes appears at the gates(No, he not still naked) and Daryl takes off in the direction of the daycare center without as much as a hello. Anthony!

    Rick and Shane are face to face. Rick demands to know how. Shane explains to him that he survived the stabbing and that he wasn't actually a walker and that the gun Carl shot him with only had blanks in it. Lori pipes in and says "Who's Carl". Rick look at her and then at Shane. He says to Shane, "You know what? I'm glad you took her off my hands. She never got my underwear truly clean anyways" He demands that they immediately leave. Carol speaks up and informs Rick that isn't his decision alone to make. She is still quite grateful to Shane for laying the beat down on Ed and has a soft spot for him. This calls for a council meeting.

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    Zach and Patrick stand in Patrick's cell about to come to blows over Patrick's authentic signed portrait of Daryl. They would each have one but Daryl's pen ran out of ink before he could sign Zach's. Just as things are about to get violent, Patrick sniffs into the air. "Do you smell that?" Zach sniffs into the air and also gets a whiff. Zach makes a break for it hoping to get to Daryl first, but Patrick was ready. He pulls out his Lego replica crossbow and shoots Zach in the calf. This doesn't stop Zach but it gives Patrcik a chance to pass him. Patrick thought he was home free but Zach had thought ahead too. They knew he'd be headed straight to the daycare center so Zach had tied some wire right in the path. Patrick, of course, trips over the wire and his glasses go flying. Zach had to stop to get the arrow out of his calf so he had a few minutes to play with.

    Carol is is headed to her love dungeon when she notices Patrick on the ground looking for his glasses. She walks up to him and he asked if he can shake her hand. She slaps him in the back of the head and tells him that even though she'd just been in the fight of her life not to insult her by thinking she smells as bad as Daryl. She gives him his glasses back and he starts running. By this time Zach has caught up. Just as the are turning the last corner they hear Daryl's screams of agony.

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    Meanwhile back at Woodbury as the stunned audience look an with a look of bewilderment, Gareth sees Lizzie headed in his direction and gets away from the crowd. They meet up behind the closest building after being careful that they weren't followed. Lizzie cuts to the chase and immediately ask him if he's gonna keep his word and allow her to come to Termimus. Gareth tells her that she's gonna have to be patient as he needs a person on the inside that can get their hands on that document. It obviously holds great power. Lizzie tell him that will be easy and that she will just frame Shumptinez for it since McLeod hates them anyways. Gareth realizes that he truly likes the way this girl thinks and that she will make a wonderful addition to Terminus and break Gov's heart in the process. If only Alex and Albert were half this smart. He informs her that he's been asked to cater the wedding and they share a laugh about how much everyone loved the meat. They see Milton wondering around and part ways.

    Lizzie sees a walker that she recognizes wondering around. It's Walker Sophia. She calls to her but Sophia immediately runs away. That doesn't happen to the Walker whisperer. It just doesn't. Extreme measures will be required

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    Merle Dixon sits in an abandoned warehouse all alone. Apparently Gov showed him the place. I guess it is where he used to take Andrea. He is lonely and bitter after making the choice to leave Woodbury after he wasn't allowed into the inner circle. Part of him misses the place and part of him would love the chance to show them his worth and then give them a big fuck you. Who do they think they are anyways? Just because his jazz hand game wasn't up to par. He knows he has other talents.

    His walkie talkie goes off and he answers and it's his old buddy Hershel. Well, he thinks he's Santa now, but either way. They've remained close after getting to know each other doing weekly Bible studies. Hershel tells him to grab the flatbed and hurry up and get to him. The sleigh has crashed. Oscar ask Hershel why in the hell hes calling an asshole like Merle about the sleigh. Hershel looks at him harshly and says "Because he built it"

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    McGovernah:VII The Wedding.



    Wedding preparations had been under way for days. Once news had spread around Woodbury about the Governor's devastatingly romantic proposal to McLeod, the unexpected and disturbing events of the Battle Royal had been quickly forgotten. Which was surely the point.

    Milton had been commissioned to make McLeod's wedding outfit after the Gov had discovered one of his previous occupations had been as costume designer to the cast of 'Dancing with the Stars'. Gareth and his Terminus crew of 'caterers' had been coming and going for days, carrying many covered containers into a specially set up preparation area and refusing all offers of help.



    Father Gabriel had been offered a wonderful deal by the Gov. He he would perform the ceremony, and
    then Shumptinez would not feed him to walker Nick one piece at a time. Unsurprisingly Father Gabriel had accepted these terms without argument.

    The Governor was feeling a little stressed however. McLeod had not been herself since she had been interrupted in the middle of her crushing of Carol Peletier. She hadn't given him a really decent thrashing since. He could feel his eye beginning to wander.

    Psycho Lizzie stood in the town square watching the comings and goings in a distracted fashion. A movement behind her made her jump...it was Gareth.
    "Looking forward to the wedding?" he smirked. Lizzie looked at him in disgust. "No I'm not!" she exploded. "I don't see why I have to go. They're making me flower girl. I've spent days now looking at flowers and I'm sick of it! Plus the dress Milton has made for me is stupid and they're making me wear a braid in my ponytail. I will look like a Disney Princess!". Gareth smiled."Never mind,not long to go now". And with that he went to collect another large tub of unspecified meat products. While Lizzie kicked at the ground with frustration, neither of them noticed TD who stood and watched the little exchange with interest.



    Meanwhile McLeod was having the finishing touches made to her hair and make-up. She had to admit that Shumpert had done a wonderful job of setting her hair and Martinez work with his make-up kit had really brought out the colour of her eyes. Maybe she had been right to keep them around after all.
    She shooed them away so that they could get ready for their Best-Man duties and so that Milton, who was also acting as Chief Bridesmaid to avoid any issues with the Gov's little 'problem', could help her with her wedding garments. She stood back to admire the effect. Perfect.

    At noon a crowd assembled ready to watch the wedding procession embark on the short trip from McGovernah's penthouse to the wedding venue. Only a select few were allowed to witness the actual ceremony, but the entire town was invited to the lavish reception afterwards on presentation of a gift.

    The Gov accompanied by Best-Men Shumptinez, TD and Gargulio 2 left the penthouse first, all dressed in resplendent suits specially looted for the occasion, and made their way to the venue. The Gov looked particularly handsome in a rakish custom eye-patch made especially by Milton.

    After a fifteen minute delay, McLeod and her entourage consisting of flower-girl Lizzie, Chief Bridesmaid Milton and Woodbury hanger-on Denny Ainsworth also began the journey to where the wedding would take place. Her appearance drew gasps of admiration from the crowd and she greeted them all with a regal wave.

    McLeod and her party arrived promptly. Lizzie looked at her and wrinkled her nose. "Here?" she asked incredulously. McLeod smiled at her coldly and they entered the Gov's special experimentation chamber.
    The Gov was waiting inside the door, he took in the beauty of Milton's fine handiwork. McLeod was wearing a conventional wedding dress complete with veil. She looked radiant and the Gov had to admit that the ball-gown Milton was wearing was really working for him although the feathered head-dress was a little too much. He glared at Denny Ainsworth.
    "What's he doing here?" he asked. McLeod smiled. "He's my something old" she said. "Something old,something new" she indicated to her dress. "Something borrowed". Milton held up the jar containing Gargulio 1's head. "Something blue". McLeod opened the actually really quite large purse that she was carrying. A loud buzzing filled the air. The Gov smiled while the rest of the assembled party looked faintly sick.

    The Gov adjusted his collar. "My dear, shall we?" he asked. McLeod stepped forward and as she did so Milton yanked hard on the back of her dress which split cleanly in two revealing a studded leather cat-suit and matching boots. Milton stepped forward and replaced her white veil for a black one.

    "Let me walk you down the aisle". McLeod said, and as she did so she clipped a leash onto the Gov's collar.


    Inside the experimentation chamber Father Gabriel stood in front of the altar looted from his own church, he was sweating profusely. He had had plenty of time to take in the doctor's chair, array of surgical instruments and most worrying of all, large bloodstain on the floor. He felt a little faint.
    The Gov and McLeod made their entrance and began to walk down the aisle. Well McLeod walked, the Gov crawled on all-fours.
    Father Gabriel nervously began reading the re-written ceremony that McGovernah had provided him with, stumbling over his words.

    "Dear friends and sub-ordinates, we are gathered here to witness the re-commitment of vows between this man and this Goddess in human form. First may I ask if there is anyone who knows of any reason why these two cannot be joined together to please speak now..."

    McLeod's purse began to buzz loudly making Denny Ainsworth jump and then begin to cough. The Gov made a throat-slitting gesture at Shumptinez who grabbed hold of him and dragged him away.

    The rest of the ceremony went off without a hitch until Father Gabriel announced that the Gov could kiss his bride. After fifteen minutes of undignified groping during which the assembled guests stared intently at either the ceiling or the floor, the room was finally cleared by the unmistakable sound of a cat-suit being unzipped.



    An hour later and the reception was in full swing. Gareth and his team had been incredibly busy and there was food in abundance as well as a dizzying amount of celebratory booze. The assembled guests were fit to burst and as drunk as skunks.

    Lizzie and walker Nick sat underneath the table holding all the wedding gifts. Nick was extremely agitated and Lizzie was having trouble calming him.
    "Shh Nick!" she whispered. "You're going to get in trouble!". Nick thrashed and made a lunge out from under the table, Lizzie grabbed him and as she did so something splashed onto her arm...it was blood. Lizzie peeked out and saw a thin trickle coming from one of the brightly wrapped packages. She snagged it and had a look. It was a human hand. Lizzie gave it to Nick to chew on and investigated further. All the wedding gifts had been replaced by body-parts. Lizzie smiled,she knew just who had done it too.

    The Gov was drunk. He lurched to his feet and started banging his fork on his champagne glass. "Speech time!" he slurred. "I want to thank my beautiful wife for agreeing to marry me again today.We showed them didn't we my love.No-one can throw a wedding quite like we can!" he began to sway. "I want to thank all our guests. Shumptinez I can always count on you" McLeod's lips thinned into a line. "Milton for the wonderful outfits,Lizzie my baby-girl who did so well with those flowers, TD and Gargulio 2 not just employees, but family! And Gareth, you and your team have created a feast fit for my Queen!"

    Gareth smiled at the Governor and held up his hand. "About that" he said "We are going to need paying straight away. Our products require intense effort to procure and prepare,it has been no small effort to cater this wedding. You enjoyed all that we produced for you but now it's time to settle the bill."

    Gareth reached into one of the catering tubs and withdrew something. The Gov struggled to focus. "Ms McLeod" said Gareth. "I thought it was such a shame that your old mentor Abuela couldn't be here to share your day, so I made sure she could play just a small part." Gareth tossed Abuela's head onto the table in front of McLeod. Gargulio 2 recoiled in horror. "She was surprisingly succulent for such an old lady wasn't she,you seemed to really enjoy her."

    The Gov and McLeod slowly began to realize what Gareth was implying. Gargulio 2 began to weep and retch. McLeod started to get to her feet, just as Martin stepped up behind her and put a gun to her head. All of the 'caterers' were suddenly armed, guns trained on all the Woodbury folk.

    Gareth smiled at McLeod. "We are taking this town, you can either join us or you will feed us." He looked her directly in the eye. "The question is....which one will it be?"



    Now that Gareth's true colours are revealed,what does this mean for McGovernah? Will he really take over Woodbury? If Abuela is dead,what happened to Oscar?
    Are Milton's talents truly limitless? And how come Shumptinez are so good with hair and make-up?

    Literally some of these questions will be answered in the next instalment of McGovernah!


    Brought to you by NimbusForTheMasses with thanks once again to @Mia Dixon for the wedding picture.

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