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  1. Back To Top    #1
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    Governor John Dixon's Avatar

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    The Anthony Saga!

    It's been a long time coming, but now it's time for Anthony's origin:

    Dawn breaks. Daryl wakes up. "Ugh" he says. This isn't the Daryl we know from the ZA. This is pre ZA Daryl. The one that only knows about 123 different words since he only schooling was from an absentee brother and a drunken, abusive father. So he speaks the language the best he can.
    As he sits up he looks around in the dump of a shack he and Merle and some of their friends have been crashing at the last 4 days. He smells something rank. It's everywhere! He looks down at where he fell over and passed out the night before. A pile of vomit. He touches his face and hair and realizes he's slept in this crap for god knows how long. The worst part is that it isn't even his! It's crusted to his face and his head. Thankfully Merle shaved his head the night before because he lost a bet that he couldn't piss himself while drinking a beer and smoking some meth all at the same time. Then he realizes he smells like piss too. It's an enchanting musk that will surely draw inbred skanks to him, which he usually welcomes because if they'll do their brothers then they'll definitely do him since he's only a distant cousin. "Can't do this much too man more" he thought to himself. This place has no running water and he decides he should finally wash up after 2 months of activity like this. So he heads out. Before he leaves he grabs his crossbow, he finishes a half drunk, warm beer and smokes the last quarter of a joint left in the ashtray.

    Daryl stumbles along the trail to the pond. Half way there he realizes he doesn't even have his pants on. Just some gray boxer shorts. Well, in all honesty they used to be white. Daryl just hopes he doesn't see anyone he has to explain this too. It would be too complicated for him to explain given his language barriers. He brushes up against a pricker bush, scratching his dirty leg. "Fucking prickle lettuce" he thought. He doesn't know the plants name. After a while he reaches the pond. It doesn't look clean at all. It's covered in pond scum. Mosquitoes and flies buzzing over it. But he has no choice. The piss/vomit smell is getting worse as the day gets hotter. He removes his precious gray-white boxers and his angel wings vest to jump in. As he's about to, he thinks to himself: "I just did much too drugs many". But there is another voice, and remarkably, the words are in clear English. "Daryl, you are a good, kind man who strives to be clean. But this isn't the way." Even more remarkable is the fact that Daryl can understand this new language, but he continues to listen. "I'm over here Daryl, you're salvation is over here." "What fuck the saliva be?" He thought. The voice then says, "No you dumb mother fucker, SALVATION! No saliva, god damn you're dumb!" At this point Daryl just thought that warm beer or joint must have been laced with something. That he's tripping out. So he sits down and takes a few breaths to try to let this weirdness pass. And there it is again: "If I have to tell you to come over here one more time you dumb redneck, I'm just going to drown you in this filthy water myself." At this point Daryl is just plain scared. How can his brain be talking to him in a more literate fashion when his brain only knows 123 words to begin with? He stands up and grabs his crossbow thinking someone is fucking with him. Someone hidden behind a tree perhaps. He begins to circle the circumference of the small pond, only to hear this: "Turn around dipshit! I'm right behind you!" Daryl turns sharply towards the pond. No one. Nothing. Then he looks down. At his feet sits a small pond turtle. He looks at it inquisitively. "Moving water rock! Good eat them I like" he thinks to himself. As he pulls out his knife to kill the "moving water rock" to eat, it looks up at him. They lock eyes. Daryl is scared again because a "moving water rock" has never looked at him like this before. Then in his head, once again, he hears words. "My name is Anthony, it's nice to finally meet you Daryl!" "I've been searching for you for a long time." "Sit down, we need to talk." Daryl complies because he knows enough to relent to something smarter than he, especially when Merle isn't around. He lays his crossbow against a tree, slowly sits and asks this benevolent creature: "What want you from I?" Anthony looks down, rolls his eyes, looks back up at this cave person and says: "Holy shit dude, we have a lot of work to do."

    Anthony tells Daryl everything. He explains that even though it may seem ridiculous, he will need this "moving water rock" to better himself. He explains that he will be more important to him than his own flesh and blood. He even manages to get Daryl to speak English to a 7th graders level in just an hour so that Daryl knows that he is actually called a "turtle". A MAJOR accomplishment in Anthony's eyes. He was only hoping to get him up to a 4th graders understanding of the language. Slowly, Daryl realizes that Anthony can't actually speak, that he only communicates mentally. And only to Daryl. No one else can understand Anthony's wisdom. Now that Daryl can speak somewhat like an adult, the first question he asks Anthony is: "Can I still get wasted everyday and let my brother drag me around like his dog?" "Jesus fucking Christ" thinks Anthony. "No, you cocksucking, backwoods moron!" "How the hell are you going to be able to do what needs to be done if you are tweeking all day and waking up smelling like piss and vomit all over again?" "I'm not starting this whole thing over again with you. You either listen or I'll kill you myself!" Not thinking a small turtle was capable of such things, Daryl doesn't tempt fate. He decides to believe Anthony. They talk between themselves, mentally, for the next few hours. Eventually, Daryl realizes THIS is his mentor. That Merle never had anything good planned for him. And he wants to be clean, smell better and keep Anthony alive. Anthony tells him the first step is going back to that shitty shack he and his brother and friends were holed up in, and tell them he's done. Done with it all. That he has a new lease on life. That it's because of him. Daryl feels a debt to this "moving water rock", shit, no! "He's a turtle" he reminds himself. So he takes Anthony up on his offer. Daryl will protect Anthony as long as Anthony keeps teaching him stuff he never knew. Like how to tie his shoes without just knotting them over and over again. This might just work, thought Daryl. But how will Merle take it? After all, he was replacing his mentor. Merle might not like this at all. But Daryl scooped up Anthony, cleaned him upon his request and safely put him in the breast pocket of the angel wing vest for the journey back.

    What happens next may be shocking to some. But you'll just have to wait until chapter 2 of The Anthony Saga!

    A special thank you to @HateForTheMasses for giving me the idea of starting such a wonderful story before the ZA began.

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    Governor HateForTheMasses's Avatar

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    Moving water rock! That's fucking brilliant. I love how you've played up how dumb Daryl was. The beginning of a beautiful friendship

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    Governor John Dixon's Avatar

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    Quote Originally Posted by HateForTheMasses View Post
    Moving water rock! That's fucking brilliant. I love how you've played up how dumb Daryl was. The beginning of a beautiful friendship
    How could I not? It was sitting right there for me to use the whole time. Daryl being a dimwit was always part of the plan for this story lol.

    I still love him though Daryl peeps! Don't worry. This is just for fun. And I will have fun with this!

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    Sharpshooter Stacy Dixon's Avatar
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    Daryl never even got to take his bath lol. Anthony is now more useful and pivotal than Daryl's crossbow.

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    Governor Dark Nimbus's Avatar

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    @John Dixon the great depth of their friendship is now becoming abundantly clear! Can't wait to find out what happens next!

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    Governor John Dixon's Avatar

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    Many great ideas are brewing. Daryl may yet get his bath @Stacy Dixon! Daryl NEEDS a bath.
    @Nimbus, you have no idea, lol. We haven't begun to see the depth of their friendship yet.

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    Governor Manasicaroltwd's Avatar

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    Omg love it :)
    Anthony and Daryl's friendship is just..wow
    Will we ever get to see a love interest for Anthony!!


    Anthony needs love and Daryl needs a bath

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    Governor John Dixon's Avatar

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    Quote Originally Posted by Manasicaroltwd View Post
    Omg love it :)
    Anthony and Daryl's friendship is just..wow
    Will we ever get to see a love interest for Anthony!!
    http://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/...20130822000935

    Anthony needs love and Daryl needs a bath
    I can't answer any questions, this script is top secret, lol. But I like your new avatar.

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    Quote Originally Posted by John Dixon View Post
    I can't answer any questions, this script is top secret, lol. But I like your new avatar.
    Wish that's what NR said during his interviews lol
    Aww

    And thanks
    Vero's always awesome <3

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    Daryl Fan Bekki's Avatar


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    It's an enchanting musk that will surely draw inbred skanks to him
    "Turn around dipshit
    "Moving water rock! Good eat them I like"


    This is so damn funny... I love their Origins Tale.

    Also the fact that Daryl was talking to Anthony the whole time nude.........

    I can't wait to read more!!!

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